Access Denied (and other eighth grade error messages) Read online

  COPYRIGHT

  Copyright © 2009 by Denise Vega

  All rights reserved. Except as permitted under the U.S. Copyright Act of 1976, no part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, or stored in a database or retrieval system, without the prior written permission of the publisher.

  Little, Brown and Company

  Hachette Book Group

  237 Park Avenue, New York, NY 10017

  Visit our website at www.HachetteBookGroup.com

  www.twitter.com/littlebrown

  Little, Brown and Company is a division of Hachette Book Group, Inc.

  The Little, Brown name and logo are trademarks of Hachette Book Group, Inc.

  First eBook Edition: July 2009

  The characters and events portrayed in this book are fictitious. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author.

  ISBN: 978-0-316-05251-1

  Contents

  COPYRIGHT

  CHAPTER 1: PARENTAL MISGUIDANCE SUGGESTED

  CHAPTER 2: FRIENDS IN DEED

  CHAPTER 3: FIRST DAY FINE

  CHAPTER 4: HILLS AND VALLEYS

  CHAPTER 5: MAKING HISTORY

  CHAPTER 6: ERIN PREPARIN’

  CHAPTER 7: LOST AND FOUND

  CHAPTER 8: FOULING OUT

  CHAPTER 9: LIFE OF THE UNPARTY

  CHAPTER 10: SMOKE SIGNALS

  CHAPTER 11: KISS-A-BOWL

  CHAPTER 12: FALLING IN LIKE

  CHAPTER 13: CLUB COOL

  CHAPTER 14: COMMUNICATION CONFUSIFICATION

  CHAPTER 15: THE MAKE-OUT SHUFFLE

  CHAPTER 16: THANK YOU FOR NOT SMOKING

  CHAPTER 17: IT HAPPENS

  CHAPTER 18: I AM WOMAN

  CHAPTER 19: MALL RATS

  CHAPTER 20: BEST FRIENDLESS

  CHAPTER 21: RELATION SHIPWRECKED

  CHAPTER 22: WORD FROM THE WISE

  CHAPTER 23: BIG DRAMA IN LITTLE ERINVILLE

  CHAPTER 24: SINGLE GIRL

  CHAPTER 25: HOMEWORK HELPER

  CHAPTER 26: BEYOND HOT TAMALES

  CHAPTER 27: MOON OVER MASSEY

  CHAPTER 28: UNSECRET CRUSH

  CHAPTER 29: HOLLOW-WEENIES

  CHAPTER 30: DOWN IN THE DUMPS

  CHAPTER 31: ON THE NOSE

  CHAPTER 32: INTERPERSONAL INTRIGUE

  CHAPTER 33: BLIND DATE

  CHAPTER 34: BLOWN OFF COURSE

  CHAPTER 35: ERIN’S EXCELLENT ADVENTURE

  CHAPTER 36: SLOPELESS IN DENVER

  CHAPTER 37: UPSIDE DOWN

  CHAPTER 38: CODE RED, CHERRY RED

  CHAPTER 39: PARTY GIRL

  CHAPTER 40: STRANDED

  CHAPTER 41: OPERATION ERIN P. MASSEY

  CHAPTER 42: DEAD GIRL WALKING

  CHAPTER 44: SCHOOL DAZE

  CHAPTER 45: MESSAGES

  CHAPTER 46: CONNECTIONS

  CHAPTER 47: UNDERCURRENTS AND OVERFLOWS

  CHAPTER 48: RUDE AWAKENINGS

  CHAPTER 49: LIFTING WEIGHTS

  CHAPTER 50: BIRTHDAY PRESENCE

  Also by Denise Vega:

  Click Here

  [to find out how i survived seventh grade]

  To my niece, Jordan Rae Applehans, who shared not only her eighth grade experiences with me, but also her wisdom. Keep doing great things, J!

  This is the new and improved, totally secret & private home page of ERIN PENELOPE SWIFT. Thanks 2 computer camp, I added way cool stuff like video & podcasts. I’m using more “lingo” now that I can finally IM and I know more of that stuff. I rock.

  HOT— —METER

  #1 Mark Sacks—the hair, the butt in shorts—need I say more?

  Other cute guys will go here as I spot them…

  THINGS YOU SHOULD KNOW ABOUT ME

  I am totally over the Year of Humiliating Events (YOHE), aka seventh grade, when this personal, private, noone-will-see-but-me blog was blasted over the school Intranet (that would be Molly Brown Middle School, aka MBMS) & every1 hated me 4 awhile.

  Jillian Gail Hennessey—aka Jilly—was my BFF… then wasn’t cuz of YOHE… now is again—goes out w/ Bus Boy (Jon Lanner). I call him Bus Boy cuz he 1st noticed her on the bus last year. Now he’s at Wash Hi w/ Chris, my big bro. Jilly & I were not on the same track at MBMS last year but they switch it around every year so maybe this year we’ll be 2gether.

  Mark, Rosie, Carla & Tyler r also buds… went 2 computer camp w/ all except Carla, who isn’t really into computers the way we r… Carla was my locker partner last year & is hanging out w/ us more… I had crush on Tyler during camp… he liked Rosie… Rosie liked some guy from another school… we’re done w/ all that now.

  I used 2 have a major crush on Mark but no1 knew until the BN (Blog Nightmare)… then he liked Jilly… then didn’t… we actually had a lame kiss & decided friends better—he started going out w/ Kara Simmons in July.

  Serena Worthington has always been mean 2 me but last year we came 2 a truce. We’re not friend friends but she did come 2 my bday party & we can @ least talk & joke around a little now. I deleted the SW Hate-o-Rama/Dislike-o-Rama page cuz of that & also cuz she doesn’t need 2 be taking up space on my website (except 4 here where I explain—2 WHO???—why her page is history).

  THINGS THAT BOTHER ME

  My parents seem 2 be on my case more l8ly.

  I can’t seem 2 talk 2 my mom like I used 2.

  THINGS THAT JUST ARE

  This year my parents made me choose b/t bball & soccer so I picked bball.

  Chris still wears orange boxers w/ green frogs on them, even tho that info got out during the YOHE… dating Bethany since May.

  DISGUSTING FACT #1: Bethany picks her nose.

  DISGUSTING FACT #2: She has touched Chris w/ those booger fingers.

  2 bad cuz she’s really nice.

  INFO ABOUT THE LINKS

  MY LIFE is still where I spill my guts. I tried not writing in a blog at all but couldn’t do it.

  MUG SHOTS has a few pix of me & my buds.

  HOT——METER is where I’ll list all the hot guys in my life (please let me have some). Right now it’s just Mark cuz even tho we r just friends, he is still very hot & he’s the only 1 I can think of. & yes, the text scrolls—thank u computer camp & JavaScript.

  LOOK AND LISTEN is where I have videos & podcasts. Jilly & I made some goofy videos @ her house & Mark & I did a podcast about the history of soccer 4 English last year. He was the interviewer & I was the soccer ball.

  SNICKERS is just there cuz I love Snickers almost as much as I love cherry Tootsie Pops & when I click it, it reminds me where my stash of Snickers is.

  TTFN. © 2009 EPS, Inc. All Rights Reserved

  EPS Privacy Policy: It’s ALL private. KEEP OUT!

  Don’t like this website? Too bad!

  The webmaster does NOT want to hear from

  THE PED STOPS HERE

  CHAPTER 1

  PARENTAL MISGUIDANCE SUGGESTED

  “WHY CAN’T I GO?” I stood on one side of the island in the kitchen, my mom on the other. She was chopping onions for dinner with a chopper that made a loud thwacking sound when she pressed down on the handle.

  “Because—” Thwack! “—you’re too young to go to a rock concert.” She paused to look up at me. “I know Carla’s dad will be there but it’s not about parental supervision. It’s about being in an environment that you don’t need to be exposed to right now.” She paused, itching her nose with the back of her hand. “Maybe if it was a different band. But that one…”

  Her voice trailed off as my insides curled up, hardening in
to stone. Every time I turned around lately there was a new rule and each one began with NO. No staying out past ten on a weekend night (the city curfew was eleven!), no short skirts (which I don’t wear anyway), no unsupervised parties, no cell until high school, no web presence (meaning no MySpace, no live blog, no nothing, even though I totally know about being safe online)—and on and on until we got to the latest NO—no rock concert. They did say yes to IM finally but way late—most of my friends had been IMing since 5th or 6th grade.

  “Why do you always do this?” I asked. “Everyone else gets to go.” Which technically wasn’t true. Rosie wasn’t going either. But Jilly, Mark, Tyler, and all of my other friends were.

  “You know better than to use the ‘everyone else is doing it’ argument. That doesn’t fly in this house.” Mom scraped the chopped onions into a bowl and placed another half onion in the chopper. Her lips pursed as she concentrated on another thwack. A few gray strands curled out of her brown hair and her eyelids seemed to droop. She suddenly looked like someone I didn’t know—or maybe just someone who didn’t know me—and I had no idea when that had happened. After the BN we’d gotten close but then summer came and I was doing a lot more with my friends and things felt different. We never used to fight—well, almost never. But now we do.

  “But it’s true,” I said. “And it’s embarrassing to always have to say my parents won’t let me.” They wouldn’t even let me go to just any PG-13 movie. Hello? PG-13? I’m thirteen? But no, my mom had to see the movie first or go to one of those online parental movie guides that rated the amount of “bad stuff” in the movie and described various scenes. She practically had to write a research paper on it. And sometimes she’d do all that and wouldn’t let me go and I’d have to lie and tell my friends I had a family thing so I wouldn’t be completely humiliated. But I had a feeling they knew anyway, which made it even worse.

  “Well, I’m sorry if we embarrass you, Erin, but that’s the way it is.” Thwack! She dumped the rest of the onions in the bowl. “I didn’t go to a rock concert until I was sixteen.”

  “Things are different now,” I said. “Kids grow up faster.”

  My mom shook her head. “No, they don’t. You’re just getting exposed to things at an earlier age. That doesn’t mean you can handle them.” She picked at some stray bits of onion stuck on the chopper blade. “It’s about safety and well-being and whether your mind and emotions can process all of it in an effective manner.” She turned to the sink and washed her hands, scrubbing each finger.

  I groaned. I hated when she talked like some parenting magazine article. “But you were so proud of how I handled things last year. Don’t you think I can handle this?”

  “We are proud of how you handled last year. But this is different.” My mom put her hands on the counter and looked at me, her face softening. “I know how important this is to you, Erin. Really. But you have to understand that it’s my job to do what’s best for you, regardless of what you want or what other parents are allowing their kids to do.” She crossed to the sink and rinsed out the chopper. “I know this seems like the end of the world right now, but there will be lots of concerts in your life, Erin. And lots of other things when you’re ready for them. I don’t know why you all have to rush out and do everything right now.”

  “I’m not rushing out to do everything right now,” I said. “I just want to go to this one concert with my friends right before we start eighth grade.”

  “You’re not going, Erin,” my mom said, placing the chopper on the rack to dry, “and that’s final.”

  The stone inside me cracked.

  “I’m not a baby!” I shouted. “And I wish you’d stop treating me like one!” Tears pricked my eyes. Why did that always happen? Why did I feel like crying when I was mad? I ran upstairs and slammed my door, enjoying the satisfying bang that reverberated through the house. I didn’t care if my “behavior” wasn’t showing my maturity. It felt good to slam a door.

  CHAPTER 2

  FRIENDS IN DEED

  I STAYED IN MY ROOM the rest of the night, refusing to come down for dinner. I wouldn’t even talk to my dad, who tried to get me to come out with a lame joke about a rock star walking into a bar. How could he make fun of my situation when he was one of the two Parental Paranoids keeping me from having a good time?

  I turned up the volume on my speakers in reply.

  “If you get hungry, you can warm up some food later,” he said loudly through the door.

  “I won’t get hungry,” I replied, trusting the music to drown out my grumbling stomach.

  “Okay,” he said, “But if you or your stomach changes your mind…” He tapped twice on the door before shuffling away.

  “Never!” I shouted after him, flopping down on my bed. Maybe I should go on a hunger strike until they let me go to the concert. They would find me wasting away in my room, barely able to raise my head off my pillow, but with Jilly’s help I’d have just enough strength to put on my new probably-too-short shorts with the to-die-for layered tank tops, dab on some makeup, fix my hair, and slip into a car that would whisk me away to the concert. There I would finally eat and regain my full strength so I could dance and clap my hands to the beat.

  The stomach grumbles were becoming unbearable. I rolled over on my side and tried to think of something besides the roast chicken that was cooking in the oven, its aroma wafting up the stairs and under my door.

  I glanced at the clock. Barely ten minutes had passed since my dad had come up. Why did I say never? Never was a long, long time.

  An hour later, there was a sharp knock on the door. I sat up straight, grateful for getting lost in my book. I was still hungry, but I didn’t feel like I might start eating the bedpost anymore.

  “Yeah?” I said cautiously.

  “It’s me.” My brother’s voice was low outside the door.

  “Come in.”

  Chris stepped inside, carrying a plate of food and a glass of water. It was all I could do not to leap off my bed and gobble it down with my fingers.

  “I figured you were lying about being hungry.” He held the plate out and I immediately shoveled a mound of mashed potatoes and gravy into my mouth. He pulled out the chair and flipped it around so he was sitting with his arms resting on the back. “I know you’re mad that you can’t go to the concert but you’ve got to suck it up or they’re never going to let you do anything.”

  “I can’t help it,” I said, between bites. “It’s totally unfair.” When he started to speak, I held up my hand. “And don’t tell me you didn’t get to go to a concert until you were in high school. This isn’t about you.”

  Chris laughed. “No, it’s about you messing up your future. And mine. They’re talking about having a family night the night of the concert so you won’t feel left out. There goes my Friday night.”

  “Sorry,” I muttered.

  Chris brushed his fingers through his hair, making it stand up at odd angles. “Just be cool, Erin. That’s all I’m saying. Take it from someone who’s been there.”

  That night Mark sent me an IM.

  Slamdunk12: Bummer about the concert. We’ll miss u.

  Webqueen429: Thx. Maybe they’ll change their minds.

  Slamdunk12: Hope so.

  I watched the cursor blinking on my screen. Then Mark started typing again.

  Slamdunk12: Confession: My mom screens PG-13 movies b4 she’ll let me c them.

  Webqueen429: WHAT??? Serious?

  Slamdunk12: Dead

  Mark had to be one of the coolest people on the planet. I knew he was telling me because of the whole concert thing. How many guys would admit something like that?

  Webqueen429: ur just saying that.

  Slamdunk12: No. Truth.

  Webqueen429: Mine 2. But u knew that already, right?

  Slamdunk12:

  Webqueen429: So they screen PG-13 movies but u can go 2 a rock concert?

  Slamdunk12: Strange but true. I smiled.

  Webqueen429
: Thx

  Slamdunk12: 4 what?

  I wanted to say for our friendship. For knowing I felt bad and trying to make me feel better. For just being you. But I knew if I said all that he’d either barf on his keyboard or run screaming from the room.

  So I didn’t.

  A second IM window popped up on my screen.

  Jillrox713: EPS, u there?

  Webqueen429: Yep.

  Jillrox713: Just wanted 2 say it totally stinks abt concert.

  Webqueen429: u could stay home w/ me 2 show yr support.

  Jillrox713: u no I luv u but—

  Webqueen429: u really want 2 go.

  Jillrox713: Is that ok?

  It would have been great if she was willing to stay with me but bad too because I would have felt guilty for making her miss it.

  Webqueen429: Sure. I was just kidding. What r u doing right now?

  Jillrox713: Texting Jon. U?

  Webqueen429: IMing Mark.

  Jillrox713: Ooh la la. Does Kara know?

  Webqueen429: ha ha.

  Jillrox713: Say hey for me.

  Ding.

  Slamdunk12: E, u there?

  Webqueen429: Sorry. Jilly was IMing. She says hey.

  Slamdunk12: Hey 2 Jilly.

  I wanted to keep talking but Chris was breathing down my neck to use the computer.

  Webqueen429: Chris needs the computer. Gtg cu

  Slamdunk12: Hey 2 Chris. cu

  That night I lay in my bed, smiling up at the ceiling. It totally stunk that I couldn’t go to the concert but it made me feel good that Mark cared enough to tell me about the movie thing and Jilly had checked in. It was good to have friends who understood when your parents were driving you crazy.

  Sunday, August 17

  HOT——METER

  #1 Mark Sacks—the hair, the butt in shorts—need I say more?

  Other cute guys will go here as I spot them…

  THINGS THAT ROCK

  School starts on Tues… Jilly & I r on the same track!

  Rosie, Tyler, & Mark r also on my track—clearly a sign that 8th grade will be the BEST. Serena is 2.